Health/Psychology: How to Take out Your Head Trash

Most of us understand that a negative self image only serves to work against us. Here are some suggestions to turn that negative image into a positive one.

You’re standing on a gold mine. You know that treasure is buried in there somewhere. So you start digging away… with a teaspoon. How long is that going to take you?

Many smart, talented, motivated people are digging for gold using a teaspoon. Yet, if they’d look closely, a beautiful new backhoe sits untouched right under their noses.

You can’t get to your inner “gold” without using the right tool. Ironically, the #1 thing that keeps most of us from our buried treasure is our own head trash, which says things like, “I can’t do it… I’ll never make it… I’m not smart enough… I’m not enough.”

If you want to unearth the treasure buried within you, try this exercise called “Excavating and Evicting Your Negative Reflection.” Your Negative Reflection is like looking in a funhouse mirror to see what you look like. A funhouse mirror distorts your image and causes your head trash. So the first thing we need to do to get your foot off the brake is to excavate your Negative Reflection – get it out in the open – and then evict it – tell it to take a hike.

Take out a sheet of paper and draw two columns: your Negative Reflection on one side and your Authentic Self on the other. First, write your Negative Reflection. What is your head trash saying to you?

Maybe it’s been telling you, “You can’t do it. You’ll never make it. You’re a a phony, and nobody likes you.” Whatever it is, just write it down.

Once you’ve done that, get quiet and listen. Just listen to Who You Really Are. Now, write a statement from your Authentic Self.

Your Authentic Self is Who You Really Are, not the bully in your head. That Negative Reflection is just a bully who’s been living in your head. Your Authentic Self is that still, small voice within that might say, “I am good enough because I bring Value into people’s lives, and I enjoy doing that. I CAN succeed at whatever I put the work into.”

For example, one of my Students wrote:

Negative Reflection: I am not smart enough to be successful. My ADD keeps me from being able to focus, and therefore being able to attain success.

Authentic Self: I am in the top 2% of intelligent people in this world (how many times do I have to be hit in the head to get this?), and if anyone is smart enough to be successful, it’s me. I have proven through previous work that I have the ability to be focused and remain on task for long periods of time.

When you’re done with both columns, answer these questions:

1. Who will I share this information with?
2. When will I share it with them?
3. How will doing that help me gain correct perspective?
4. What are specific examples where the Negative Reflection is WRONG?

Notice that we’re killing your head trash with facts and data. For example, my Negative Reflection might say, “Nobody likes having me around.” But I could realize, “Wait a minute. Plenty of people like me. I just got off the phone with five different people who enjoyed talking to me!” So when that Negative Reflection comes back, you obliterate it with the truth.

You simply say to your Negative Reflection, “You’re wrong. That’s a lie.” Combat it with facts, data and information and by getting it out in the open, out of the darkness – and that’s when you can start to mine that treasure that’s buried right inside you.